Text from the Wife today: Will you be my Valentine?
The Girl rolled her eyes.
The Boy (confused): But you’re wifes!
Me: Just because we’re married doesn’t mean we can’t be Valentines.
The Boy (confused and inexplicably angry): Why did she do that?!
Me: She was being romantic.
The Girl: Oh, yeah, Mom’s real romantic. What are you going to do, go on a date where she makes you do Math and talks about saving money?